It's been so long ago, its almost like a dream.
I just see flashes, short-lived glimpses of what we used to be.
Its been a long time since I touched you or held you in my calloused hands. Ive been alone for such a time, I wouldnt expect you to understand. I have learned to be alone, a hard and usefull skill. It makes me exempt from love; Its easier to seperate the fiegned from whats real. Relying soley on myself, I no longer have to trust. However all my treasures mold and all the riches rust. But I am free from smiles and tears and Im not a slave to anneversaries. Im not bound by Hallmark cards nor by cries from an infants nursery. There are no boring weddings to attend, no reunions to show up to. No happiness to strive for, and no long list of things to do.

I am master of my domain, there's no tug-of-war over the sheets. There are no more nagging voices saying drag the trash out to the street. There is always enough food and the shower is always hot enough for me. I thought I wanted something else but alone is what I want to be. Its been so long ago, it's almost like a dream. I have swallowed all the pain and now this is all I see.