You know what really burns my biscuits? You know what really revs my engine? You know what really lumps my oatmeal? You know what really drives me banana sandwich? You know what really grinds my gears? You know what really ruffles my feathers? You know what really smells like fish tacos?

When somebody says they forgive you, except every time you disagree about something, they dredge up your old mistakes from the murky depths of the past, so they can throw the proverbial water balloon in your face. I ask myself how far down this road must we go before I am truly forgiven? I ask myself why aren’t my present actions good enough to satisfy the flaws in me? I walk the line to overcome the doubt and I tip toe through the eggshells in order to rip away any lingering suspicions, that the change in me is real. They claim to have put the past behind them and they claim that we can move on but the truth is that they judge me in their heart of hearts. I wish they would speak their minds, instead of putting me through the whole rigmarole of “I forgive you.” Our relationship has boiled down to a steady diet of proving ones worth in order to maintain a certain peaceful balance that is both superficial and circumstantial.
No diamond is perfect, no matter how beautiful it is cut and shaped, still most of us value it not based on it flaws but simply in the strength of character brought to it by it’s imperfections. We search for clarity and often times we can only see through the dim mirror because of the disdain we harbor for one another. It has become a test of my patience to try and figure out people and their motives. I don’t know whether or not I am too sensitive or if I am just finely tuned to right and wrong because of my relationship with God the father. 1st Corinthians talks about real love, it says that love is patient and kind and that it is not easily angered and that love keeps no record of wrongs. No matter how scarred and stained people may become love will never fail us. People will fail you because it is in our nature but love will stand the test of time and I am inclined to believe God. I just wish I could get past the point when my emotions take over my ability to reason and correctly divide between what I feel and what I know to be true.